Golf Phuket

Interview with Steve Bradley, SE Asian golf enthusiast

Adrenaline: How do you feel about golf?

Steve: I’m not much of a golfer but for some reason I can’t fathom I’m totally addicted to the game. I abolutely love it here in the tropics. The balmy climate was particularly convenient for my friend Dan Franklin the other day when he tripped and fell in the lake here in Phuket, as he didn’t have to retreat to the club-house - he could just drag his dripping clothes with him until they dried off.

Adrenaline: Have you ever done anything daft yourself whilst playing golf?

Steve: More times than I can count. My most embarrassing incident occurred in the middle of a round at the Blue Canyon course here in Phuket in which I had being playing particularly atrociously, even by my standards. I had been playing so badly that I got really quite fed up and turned to my golfing buddy and said “I think I'm going to go drown myself in that lake." I suppose I was fishing for sympathy so deserved it when he chided me "impossible, there’s no way you’ll manage to keep your head down long enough."

We reached the course’s superb 12th hole, which is very easy to mess up. It was a bank holiday so the course was busier than usual - normally the relatively high prices keep the greens quite free. I was called ‘ON’ by a group in front, who were standing well behind the pin, waiting for me to hit.  With this shot I managed to actually hit the ball for a change, but badly. It soared up into the sky so high that everyone lost sight of it, including the group waiting up front. It subsequently re-entered the stratosphere at a fair rate of knots and clobbered one of the ladies on the head. I was absolutely mortified, though thankfully she was OK. I thanked God that golf balls are bouncy but then stopped being so grateful when I realised that the lady in question was the club’s captain. Just my luck, I thought, there goes my next season’s discount. Shouting “fore” hadn’t helped a bit on that occasion.

I had made such a pig’s ear of the shot that I had almost muttered a different four letter word beginning in ‘f’, but had managed to restrain myself. A couple of years previously I had not been quite so discrete whilst playing a round with my other half, who had gently chided me that the best golfers don’t use foul language. "I’m not surprised." I said "what have THEY got to swear about?"

Another time I was stymied by a large tree root that was between me and the green. I looked at it long and hard, scratched my head, wished I hadn’t given up smoking, so couldn’t puzzle it out over a fag, then finally figured that if I sliced it hard with my club it would hopefully whiz over the root and onto the green. So I sliced it and yes it did whiz, but unfortunately not in the direction desired, Apparently it hit the root, then ricocheted back and pole-axed me with a blow to the forehead. I say ‘apparently’ because I have no recollection at all of the incident, only the merciless ribbing I received in the club-house later.

Adrenaline: Thanks very much.

Steve: You’re welcome, any time.

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